#22: Vampire Courtship

This Comic's Cast:

This all comes back to a bit of a continuity snafu I had in the main archive. There, I state that vampires can't breed. In my mind they can't. It doesn't make any sense. For a vampire to breed, it has to not only be able to have sex, but also have a fully-functioning body. Everything I've ever read about vampires seems to indicate that whatever they used to do with normal bodily fluids (like cry) is now replaced with blood (so tears of blood instead of normal tears).
When everything you do is blood-based, how are you supposed to be able to have kids?
However, that all becomes a bit more of an issue when, in Castlevania continuity, Dracula has a child. Namely: Alucard.
So, how do I explain it? Well, they still can't breed, for the most part. Most of the time sex leads to nothing except for a satisfied feeling, and maybe a little awkwardness. Very rarely does anything more happen, rarer still does it lead to a pregnancy, and still rarer does that kid ever come to term.
And then, even still, if the kid comes out, most of the time he's a monstrous beast, more animal than anything resembling a human or a vampire.
So, in other words, the likelihood of a vampire ever having a real, normal child is so minimal as to be considered an impossibility.

When evil spreads across the land, and darkness rises and the monsters roam. When the creatures of the night make beautiful music, and the things that go bump in the night go bump with greater enthusiasm. When the world is in peril and is in need of a hero...

These guys are, sadly, the best the world can hope for. These are the adventures of the heroes of CVRPG. They mean well, they try hard, and occasionally they do the impossible...

They actually do something heroic.