Born in a small Irish town outside of Akron, Ohio, Mike Finkelstein lived a peaceful life in his early years. However, during the impending doom that was the Y2K scare, Mike was abandoned, at the age of five, in a sporting goods store. There, he was raised, as one of their own, by a pack of inflatable rafts.
These years spent in the retail life, living on cans of beans, learning to read by halogen, being taught to float by his new family, are among Mike's most treasured.
Tragedy struck, though, when the Author was 17: his adopted mother (a blue, two-person Saturn) fell on a box of sharpened pencils. Thankfully, she did not suffer -- deflation was almost instantaneous. The funeral was sweet, with friends and family saying few words, only the occasional rubber squeak.
Taking the lessons learned in the store, and the money he earned working in the stockroom, Mike paid his way through college, earning a double major in Private Investigations and Dental Hygenics. Educated and ready for a life out in the world, away from sharp, pointy objects, the Author joined a traveling circus. Here, he was billed as "Mr. Raft" and wowed audiences with his ability to endlessly float.
His time in the spotlight, though, was short-lived. When traveling across the country (during his third year with the circus, it should be noted), Mike discovered his next calling: whitewater tour guide for the dyslexic. Here, too, his ability to float came in invaluably, although he was ever watchful for vengeful rocks and freshwater swordfish (rare, but evil).
It was here that the Author gained notoriety, being one of the few people to save Lassie (and not the other way around) when the intrepid collie fell into the river and Mike was the one to save the pooch.
Taking his life experiences, Mike eventually settled down to write a loose interpretation of his story as the web-comic "Castlevania RPG". He currently lives on a private island in the Bahamas, having used his money made from the web-comic to buy the island and have a mansion built on the property. One day the Author hopes to be able to buy the moon. He's already close to having a down payment.